Psalm 23

I write these reflections and meditations on this Psalm not as an exercise of the mind, but because this Psalm found its way into my life when it gave me peace in suffering. My nights were the worst times for me and I was often terrified to try to sleep. As soon as I would relax, bright lights would go off in my head accompanied by a sudden loud sound and then a shock wave made my entire body jump. My leg would involuntarily fly in any direction. My brain would not turn off, but instead continued as if I was striving to fight off an invisible enemy. My body was tense and the nerves brittle. I had visions of floating object inside my eyes and sometimes strange sensations as if object were running around just behind my eyes as well. Many times even when I fell asleep I would suddenly have a violent electric charge that shook me awake. And I hardly ever slept all the way through any single night.

Near the beginning of one of these night I was in fear and anxiety more than usual. Then out of no where, I heard the words of this Psalm in my head - slow and deliberate. I caught them and listened closely. As they penetrated my consciousness, I felt as if a warm bath flowed over me and some knots unwound within me. Then I took it up myself - very slowly repeating again silently the words and listening to their meaning as my relaxation continued until I finally fell into a deep sleep.

This was to happen then more often in my bad nights and every time I repeated and listened and meditation of the meaning of the words, my body and mind were soothed and calmed.

Eventually I wrote out my own copy and would take it to the doctor’s office to read while they were drawing blood. I kept it with me all the time and found it to be a rock in the storm of the unpredictable.

It has taken me deeper into its meaning with time and held me in its words like a child in its mother’s arms.

The Lord is my Shepherd

I shall not want.

The Lord is a shepherd because we are like sheep. We are lost and need direction - we are prey to wild animals of both mind and heart. We live isolated lives with little sense of community and so need a “fold” and one to guard the gate. We can’t always tell the difference between those who lead us for their own gain and those who lead us for our own good, so we need a shepherd whose voice can be trusted as God’s own sounding in our inner ears where we recognize the true leader of the flock.

Because it is the Lord who is the true Shepherd we need not go on wanting and desiring in fear and worry. This shepherd knows what we need and will provide even if we do not recognize the gift. We can live daring to trust utterly, relieving ourselves of needless anxiety that eats away at our vitality and takes precious energy away from healing and renewal.

He makes me to lye down in green pastures

Sheep are lead to the pastures where the food is best for them. Our Shepherd will lead us not just to food for our bodies, but food as the Word of God to feed our very essence. We lye down and rest, we immerse ourselves in this as true peace. As we learn to rest in the spiritual truths they are more refreshing and more peaceful than the world’s offerings and become our shelter and retreat.

He lead me beside still waters.

Still waters are the clear mind and heart unruffled by trouble and anxiety and fear. They are the stillness of a quiet heart that meditates on the truth we learn from the Food of the Words of God. The still waters allow us to reflect deep and long until the truth saturates every cell of our body, every mood of our heart and every thought of our mind.

He restores my Soul

Here suddenly the image of sheep is abandoned. We are confronted with the process of the restoration of our lost souls. It is only after feeding on the truth, resting in it, meditating in inner silence over and over, that our soul is gradually restored to its rightful place. It is turned inward to look to and learn from the Spirit that both illuminates and directs it to being proper order to our whole person.

He leads me in paths of righteousness

For His name sake.

It is only with a restored Soul at the head of our person that we can finally be lead to walk on the path or the way of living rightly - in righteousness - with the right actions and right relationships and a right destination. Otherwise we are just like sheep who will stray far from life’s designed way and be in danger of becoming so lost we might ever find the right way again. It is a narrow gate and few find it, but when they do, they are guided without error in the straight way.

When we walk in the righteous way of life we are not motivated to make ourselves look better than others or to show our superiority. We only do the good for the sake of the Name of God - that through the way we live He might be honored and His Name Hallowed - we become living witnesses to God’s way in the eyes of others - living examples of the right way. There is no greater reward in life than to know we walked out path in a way the honors the Name of God.

Ye though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death

I will fear no evil.

Because I personally, have felt close to death more than once, we are reminded to face our death. For life is a valley over which the shadow of death hovers - at any moment our lives may be required of us. This is a reminder to live each moment in the face of this shadow, making use of our times to build those things that will be able to pass through this shadow without so much as a blink of an eye. This means faith and vigilance - that the inner death of the soul may not take place before the body dies, so we are not then confronted with the second death. Meditate on how to live under this shadow and yet fear no evil.

For Thou art with me.

God is with me (us) . . . Emmanuel. To live in the present rooted in the understanding that God is an ever present reality in which we “live and move and have our being”. Nothing can separate us from the Love of God. This is then the cure of our fears of evil and the evil one who seeks at all times to undermine our presence and remove us from the assurance of the remembrance of God with us always. This is the remembering of all and everything.

Thy rod and Thy staff

They comfort me.

The rod is the straight line of the Way, the narrow path that I am kept within, the path that redirects me, that prunes me, that finds the way out, that corrects my error when I “miss the mark” - (the original Greek meaning of the word translated as “sin”), and helps me “turn again” (Hebrew Teshuva) back to the Way. The staff is the curved stick that can grab me and rescue me when I do leave the Way and fall off a cliff or into the rushing waters of confusion and tribulation. It is a profound comfort to know that “God with me” always guides my me in a Way and in so doing allows me to see life as a perpetual teacher in all circumstances, both good and bad.. Both the rod and the staff are welcome comforts, for I know I cannot find the Way and stay on the Path by myself.

Thou prepares a table before me

In the presence of my enemies.

The table is the Holy Altar on which the Lord has set His Body that I may remember Him always. He sets it before me that I may digest His presence and with it, build an Altar in the most Holy place of my heart where I worship in Spirit and in Truth. The table is ultimate nourishment that never fails and always restores the link between heaven and earth - with me in the center - as the instrument of transformation.

This table is prepared in the very midst of the enemies of my daily life - every moment I am confronted with both outer and inner enemies, the social evils of human community, and the personal evils of my own bad habits and the selfishness that makes me try to meet life on my own terms and with my own behavior. Nowhere and no evil escapes its presence and the preparation is my refreshment in the very midst of each daily trial.

Thou anointest my head with oil,

Oil is the oil of healing. It is the oil what being order out of chaos - both the chaos of my outer circumstantial life, and the chaos of the illness within my body. This is the anointment offered from the Lord that is the ultimate healing agent. All work to heal comes from this source and leads to this gift. From the table and amid my enemies there is held over my head, hands from the Source of all ready to pour this restoring oil. I kneel waiting to be healed.

My cup runneth over.

As I am healed, I recognize that abundance of each tiny miracle of life - I appreciate now how precious everything, every day, every smile, every kiss, every caress, every word is. I am not necessarily cured, but I am healed in the oil of restoration and this asked me to humble praise how very blessed I am just to be alive. Nothing more. And because I have a cup that He has filled to overflowing, I want to give to others something of what I have received, for it is more blessed to give than to receive; non-the-less, the cup has been given.

Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me

All the days of my life

Because I have been given so much my heart is moved to share and to give in turn. If I can fulfill this destiny I should be able eventually to see a trail of goodness and mercy in the steps that I have traveled. And if I do not see that my life has resulted in some goodness and some mercy, I have failed to be faithful to the gift of my overflowing cup and my anointed oil.

And I shall dwell in the House of the Lord

For ever.

This dwelling need not be of a far off future only - for all of this Psalm leads up to this state of being. When I live this Psalm, not just repeat it or know it, but live it, then I am in the now present living in the House of the Lord - the Sanctuary of His Presence. To be in His House is to be in His Presence - and this is not a matter of time or of space, it is a matter of the quality of ones inner and outer being, the very essence of the life that has found the Way into the Presence which is the Eternal Now. And the more we each find our Identity in God the more we will all be identified with each other - for it is after all a house, not a solitary dwelling - but a place for a family - ultimately the family of all who are the Children of God.

© Copyright 2008 by Glenroy Wolfsen. All Rights Reserved.
wolfsen@embarqmail.com